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Confidence that everything. What gives you self-confidence? Confident people are unaware of their shortcomings

Without self-confidence, it is difficult to succeed, because business consists entirely of situations in which you have to leave your comfort zone. And all of them, from meetings and negotiations to sales and managing people, go better for you the more confident you are.

Here are 7 tricks to boost your self-confidence.

1. Never forget your strengths and don't be too hard on yourself.

For your personal use only, make a list of your strengths and the things you do really well. Be honest with yourself and avoid false modesty. It is not necessary to look for and write down outstanding qualities in yourself; these are enough: I keep my desk tidy, I finish what I start, I have a good memory, and so on. Re-read this list every week and add new items if possible. There are no ideal people. We all make mistakes. And they do not always happen solely through our fault.

2. Watch your health.

If you are in good shape, you can achieve a lot. Regular physical exercise that you enjoy doing builds strength, perseverance, and increases resistance to stress. Eat a healthy diet and get enough sleep. Rest breaks, time for relaxation and time for yourself should be as integral a part of your daily routine as brushing your teeth. Enjoy the fact that you look good and try to get the most out of life. People around you will treat you with interest and respect.

3. Stay calm and try to alleviate stress.

Avoid fuss and haste. Develop stress resistance. Simple relaxation and stress management techniques will calm your body and mind and become your lifeline. Find time for relaxation every day - at least five minutes. Practice mindfulness for at least a minute every day. Those few minutes will make a big difference.

4. Remember that you, like any person, have rights.,

which must be observed at work. Here are some of them: you have the right to your own opinion, to be treated with respect and as an equal, not to be insulted, to be listened to. You have the right to make mistakes, to fail, and to try again.

5. Plan, prioritize and be organized

You need to know where you are now, where you want to go and how you plan to get there. Know exactly what you want. Weigh everything carefully and plan. Decide what your first step will be and take it. Be prepared to adjust your plan as needed. Whatever task you face, prepare for it. If possible, rehearse your actions, such as giving a presentation, in advance. Pay attention to this and you will not only prepare for the upcoming event, but also increase your confidence and self-esteem.

6. Body language.

Move and speak with confidence and you will not only look like it, but you will actually feel like it. Raise your head, relax your shoulders and body, establish visual contact with the interlocutor. Show calm and confidence when you open the door and enter the room. An open posture, a firm handshake, and a calm voice will show your interlocutor that you are happy to see him and communicate with him. Your speech should be clear, rhythmic, and infect with enthusiasm. Show your genuine interest and you can prove yourself to be a charismatic speaker!

7. Visualize.

Imagine chewing a slice of lemon... Your mouth is probably filled with saliva. So? The thing is that the human brain is not very good at distinguishing between what happens in the imagination and in real world. That is why one of the simplest and effective ways strengthening willpower is visualization.

All you need to do is imagine a situation in which you want to feel more confident. Try to get a detailed image, then for a few minutes, step by step, work through the situation presented in your mind, coping with any difficulties that you think may arise. The task probably sounds strange, but it is easy to complete and the technique works.

You will succeed!

Even more about how to develop self-confidence and raise self-esteem in the book

This topic still continues to be relevant.

What is confidence needed for? Everyone will answer this question differently, but I know for sure that confidence is needed to become a successful person in all areas of your life. In addition, confident people are luckier, but more on that below. Everyone has confidence successful person, in every leader. Give at least one example of a truly successful and rich person who was not self-confident. I don’t really know such people, what about you? I'm sure not either.

How to be confident?

Surely many of us have asked the question at least once in our lives: “How to be confident in yourself?” . Many of us also asked questions: how to become confident that you are right under absolutely any circumstances, how to avoid pressure from others? After all, situations often arise when a person, fearing difficulties and, refuses something, perhaps even very important in his life.

And also if, God forbid, this happens, the person immediately begins to hang his nose, apathy arises and he doesn’t want to do anything. All these are precisely the very signs of self-doubt that should be fought. How to fight?

There are two types of uncertainty. The first type of uncertainty is internal - these are our thoughts, thinking, principles, philosophy and self-esteem. The second type of uncertainty is external - when our thoughts manifest themselves in actions, actions that are sometimes far from ideal.

Developing self-confidence is time-consuming and painstaking work. But rest assured that this work will pay off, and you will receive an incomparable return. Let's answer the question: “What is uncertainty and why does it arise?” Uncertainty is fear. This is to do or say something wrong, because people will laugh at you and begin to judge you. Who needs it? Uncertainty also means that your life may change in a negative way due to the actions or words of other people. In this case, people prefer to keep their mouths shut and just go with the flow, although deep down they may be tormented by resentment due to injustice. But despite this, they will still keep their mouth tightly shut. This is not something that SHOULD be dealt with, it needs to be fought. You need to boldly say it straight to your face if you really feel it.

It is important to do not what you need, but what you want. After all, you can live your whole life like this, succumbing to the influence of others. And this will definitely not give you spiritual harmony.

And again the question arises: How to become confident? And this question will arise until you begin to take specific measures.

First you need. To do this, get yourself a notebook or notepad in which you will write every time the situations that made you feel insecure, confused, afraid, or want to escape.
Then, describe in detail your feelings, what reactions you had to this or that situation, what did you do? This is necessary for self-analysis, especially since it will be easy for you to re-read it after this or that situation is resolved. Also, do not forget to write down all your victories and achievements, while writing down your feelings and thoughts.
When your notebook or notebook contains several written pages, then you will already have a huge reason to consider yourself.

So, back to the question again: How to be confident? You can overcome your insecurity in another way. For example, every morning when you wake up and get out of bed, think about how many obstacles you have overcome, how much you have achieved. Believe me, the list of your victories is much larger than you can imagine. You can talk about them while looking in the mirror. The main thing is to be in good mood and smile. After every step you take, don’t think about what other people will say. Forget about problems. Think about them only when they have already appeared and need to be addressed now. Remember, thoughts materialize (Read the article). Why do you need to attract negativity to yourself?

Developing self-confidence is not easy, but if there is a burning desire, then every person can do it. The main thing is to stop and start constantly working on yourself.

There is a belief that when a person writes his fears in a notebook, he seems to be freed from them. Believe in this method, and then everything will definitely work out for you. Another powerful way to become self-confident is to plunge into it. Face your fears. You ask how? Lie down on your bed and close your eyes, then imagine something that you are truly afraid of. at the moment. This could be absolutely any situation. In the process, try to analyze your actions. This is necessary in order to be physically and mentally prepared for them. It’s just that when you are ready, you are not so scared. Having imagined the situation several times, you are no longer afraid that this will happen to you, and you become more confident in yourself.

If the question is: “How to be confident in yourself?” is still relevant for you, that is, another powerful method. And this method is that you need to come up with an unusual hobby. Learn to do what others can't do. Feel like a special person. If you feel like a special person, then others will be able to feel it too.

After all, you will be able to do what they cannot do. And then you will become for someone the person they need to look up to.

Answering the question: “How to be confident in yourself?” , I want to motivate you. The fact is that confident people are more successful in life than insecure people. The main thing here is not to overdo it. After all, it is better to be truly confident and lucky than to appear so. And yet, in specific situations, feigned confidence can help you. For example, when you are trying to make a first impression on your boss or work team. The first impression is etched in your memory for a long time, and much in the future depends on it, namely what your future relationships and further communication with this or that person will be like.

By the way, I forgot to answer your question: “What is confidence?”. Confidence- this is not only the absence of fear, it is, first of all, the knowledge that you will be able to cope with absolutely any difficulty, as well as the knowledge that everything will be fine for you. That is, confidence is also the absence of doubt. That's right, uncertainty arises not only because of fear, it also arises when you doubt something: “Will I be able to cope at the interview?”, “Will I be able to make the right impression on the interviewer?” When a person begins to doubt, he not only hesitates in making a decision, he does not know what will happen to him if he does exactly this and not otherwise. A truly confident person behaves as he sees fit. A self-confident person understands that his behavior, his decision will lead him to the results he needs. Now do you understand why confident people are more successful in life?

Let's assume that you are confident only occasionally. In one team you are sociable and confident, while in another you are silent and withdrawn. In this case, I strongly recommend that you go to a psychologist. No offense. A psychologist will help you identify the causes of your internal self-doubt, and also give recommendations that will help you solve the problem of insecurity. Or do everything I gave you above.

Now let's go back to . What is luck? For many people, it’s just a matter of being in the right place at the right time. And for many years it was believed (and still is) that luck is a matter of chance. However, in the twentieth century best psychologists made several important discoveries. Why do you think luck smiles on the lucky ones very often (it’s not just a matter of confidence)? Why do rich people get richer and poor people get poorer? In 2003, a book was published called "The Luck Factor". It talks from a scientific point of view about the psychological differences between and lucky people. If you are one of the losers, and something constantly falls out of your hands, I again recommend that you contact a professional psychologist who will quickly understand the reasons for your eternal failures and help you turn your life around 180 degrees. I can only give a few recommendations on how to look more confident and, accordingly, more successful.

The well-being of a person’s life largely depends on his behavior and thinking. To be self-confident, it is necessary to have adequate self-esteem, that is, the correspondence of a person’s real capabilities with his expectations about his capabilities. Inadequate self-esteem, either overestimated or underestimated, not only interferes with communication, but also greatly impedes. Delusions of grandeur are an overestimation of one's abilities and capabilities, as well as self-affirmation at the expense of other people's achievements. Such a person thinks that he is always right everywhere and in everything and other people should listen to him and obey him. An inferiority complex is when a person does not want to believe in his success and does not take any action to achieve it. To increase your luck, you not only need to be confident in yourself, but you also need to learn to listen to your own. Intuition should not let you down. Imagine how lucky you are during an important interview or meeting.

To summarize the article, which answers the question: “How to be confident in yourself?”, do not forget to follow the same steps that are written above. If they don't help you, go to a psychologist. I was told that this helps. Remember, the causes of uncertainty are fear and doubts, which are not easy to get rid of, but you need to get rid of them. In this article we also touched upon the topic of luck, which also depends on confidence and which is the reason for becoming a confident person.

How to be confident


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Self-confidence is one of the few personality traits that affects the quality of almost all areas of human life. Along with increased self-confidence, the effectiveness of human actions increases, relationships with other people improve, new connections are acquired and unnecessary connections are cut off. A confident person is better motivated to achieve what he wants to achieve, sets himself up for success faster and achieves it with less effort. Self-confidence gives its owner a huge number of advantages and even makes a person happier, so if you are not confident enough, you should immediately think about developing this most important personality trait. It’s not difficult, just start taking the steps given in this article on a daily basis, and you will not only become more confident in yourself, but also change your life for the better.

55 ways to become more confident:

1. Be a confident person. Resolve to henceforth, in all situations and places, to speak and act with confidence, to be more decisive and bolder than ever before.
2. Stop complaining about your shortcomings. Every person has shortcomings, but there is one important point- self-confident people do not attach too much importance to them and do not remember them at the most inopportune time.
3. Take care of your strengths. Let your strengths will become your support in life, work on their further development and make them even stronger.
4. Stop underestimating your abilities. You should explore all your abilities and trust yourself that if necessary, you can complete a task you are familiar with, even if it looks a little more difficult this time.
5. Start studying what you want to succeed at. Stop just dreaming about what a talented or capable person you could become, and how many admiring glances would be directed at you. Start taking real steps towards becoming one in reality.
6. Review your rulebook. Your own rules are what should strengthen your spirit and make you stronger. Review your rules and eliminate those that prevent you from achieving success, and also add rules that can definitely make you more successful and more confident.
7. Make a list of things you like. Allow yourself to take an hour away from the hustle and bustle of everyday life and think about what you really like, write down a list of things you like on a piece of paper and save it for next time.
8. Develop your skills. Are you a programmer, designer or copywriter? In this case, start honing your skills and become a highly skilled specialist in what you do.
9. Direct your attention to what you like. You have already made a list of things that you like, now your task is to remember them as often as possible, especially in moments when negative thoughts bother you.
10. Show concern for others. Treat other people with more kindness, help those who are in difficult situations, especially if they are your close relatives or friends.
11. Forget about uncertainty. The more often you remember your insecurity, the more difficult it becomes for you to fight it; on the contrary, completely forgetting about it and not attaching much importance to its signs, you will get rid of it with great ease.
12. Stop tolerating things that are unpleasant for you. Make a list of the things you have to endure and begin to systematically and gradually get rid of those that cause the greatest harm to your emotional well-being.
13. Pay attention to your surroundings. Stop analyzing your feelings and going through negative thoughts in your head; instead, direct all your attention to what is happening around you.
14. Meet people. Communication is one of the basic needs of a person, do not deny yourself the opportunity to just chat and start a conversation with people you don’t know. Don't be upset if one of these people is not in the mood for communication, you'll have better luck next time.
15. Stop comparing yourself to anyone. There are many different people in the world, with a wide variety of skills and abilities, and each of these people is unique. You are also unique, so comparing yourself to anyone is not very fair.
16. Remember the 80/20 rule. The 80/20 rule states that 20 percent of the effort usually produces 80 percent of the results. Thus, you do not need to be upset if 80 percent of your efforts were in vain - the remaining 20 percent will definitely bring results.
17. Be calm about your shyness. View your shyness as a trait, not a flaw. This will make your work on eliminating it much easier.
18. Stop berating yourself. Do not under any circumstances scold yourself for mistakes or failure, in general, never scold yourself, even if it seems to you that there is a reason for this. What happened happened, draw conclusions, analyze the reasons for your mistakes and continue to move forward with new knowledge.
19. Consider your doubts. Insecure people often doubt themselves, and most of their doubts do not have a solid basis. And yet, this does not mean that all their doubts are empty. Examine your doubts and identify which ones may be justified, and also how great the risk is that they will come true.
20. Ask for help. Remember that you are not alone in this world, there are many people in the world with the same problems. There are also people who have dealt with these problems and are ready to help others with this, do not be afraid to ask for help, someone will definitely help you.
21. Do something stupid. You are a person, and like any person you are imperfect in some ways, and like any person you are not immune from committing stupidity. Do something stupid but safe for you and the people around you on purpose and laugh at yourself with others.
22. Flirt. A light, meaningless flirtation with a person of the opposite sex can lift your spirits and add variety to an everyday environment. Of course, to use it, this person must adequately perceive flirting.
23. Start exercising physically. A fit body is not only the key to health and longevity, but also a source of self-confidence. Make it a habit to exercise daily.
24. Learn to say no. Sometimes we find it difficult to say “no” to acquaintances, friends or relatives in response to their request, because at this moment we find ourselves under social pressure. And, nevertheless, remember: you do not owe anything to anyone, and you have the right to refuse the request of any person if you are really busy. Learn to say no to other people in a calm and confident manner.
25. Identify the cause of insecure behavior. Try to identify what is stopping you from speaking and acting confidently. What thoughts come to you at this moment? Destroy negative beliefs that have become a hindrance to your self-confidence.
26. Reflect on past successes. Many people remember their failures far more often than their successes, and as a result, they deliberately underestimate their abilities and give rise to further development of self-doubt. Instead, when the slightest sign When negative thoughts appear, start remembering your past successes.
27. Get organized. Clean up your home, your appearance and your head. Order will make you feel more confident and give you a sense of control over your life.
28. Listen to your intuition. Separate the voice of intuition from empty doubts, learn to distinguish between them and act as your heart tells you.
29. Remember the state of confidence. Think back to a situation in which you felt and acted with maximum confidence. What caused the emergence of confidence? Was this reason internal or external? Try to regain the same mindset that supported your sense of confidence in the past. Remember the state of self-confidence and learn to evoke it in any situation.
30. Watch your posture. Try to keep your back straight anywhere and at any time, relax all other muscles that are not involved in maintaining posture.
31. Find encouraging words. Make a list of phrases and sentences that motivate you and make you feel confident. Write them down on a piece of paper or memorize them and read them when you feel unsure.
32. Learn to accept your insecurities. Your self-doubt is something you feel at one time or another, and it is most likely caused by a situation with which you are unfamiliar. Accept this and convince yourself that next time similar situation you will act differently.
33. Make friends with your fears. Fear is natural and only becomes a problem when you don't take steps to overcome it. Therefore, use your fear as an opportunity to increase your confidence.
34. Be calm about your mistakes. There is no need to be upset by mistakes, rather look at them as an opportunity for your learning and personal growth.
35. Do everything differently. Choose a new route to go to work or home, a new store to buy groceries, a new way to do your daily work. The more often you do something new and the more often you go to new places, the more confident you will begin to feel in unfamiliar situations.
36. Do something useful for society. Being helpful to other people will greatly increase your self-confidence.
37. Be sure that you have enough strength. No matter what happens to you, remember that you have enough inner strength to cope with any, even the most difficult situation.
38. Find your true goals. When you are out of place, it is easy to begin to feel insecure, and, on the contrary, by identifying your true goals and starting to do what you are truly interested in, you will find that you can easily cope with insecurity.
39. Take action. Stop sitting with your hands folded. If a situation makes you feel insecure, then you need to work on yourself and take real steps towards eliminating your insecurity. Move forward with determination whenever you feel it is necessary, this practice will help you in gaining self-confidence.
40. Learn to control your body. The ability to control your body is a very important skill. Develop it. Learn to relax completely, relieve muscle tension and control unconscious movements. Study body language, model confident poses and gestures.
41. Meet your future self. Imagine an image of your future self, a confident and determined person, think what he would do in this situation or circumstances?
42. Define your values and stick to them. Try not to depend on other people's opinions. Make your own list of values and stick to them in any situation. Stand up for them if it is really necessary, and do as you see fit.
43. Make yourself known. Stop being in the shadows, if you have something to offer and you are sure that your proposal is worthwhile, make yourself known and express your opinion. It will either be accepted or not, nothing bad will happen again, and you will know that at least you made an attempt.
44. Have a plan of action. Learn to plan your goals. Make an action plan for every next day, every week, month, year or any other period. Implement it day after day, the result will not be long in coming.
45. Do your things on time. To become more self-confident, you need to start doing your things on your own time. There is no need to put them off until tomorrow, this will only reduce your self-confidence.
46. Learn from confident people. Observe confident people, note how they behave, how they speak, what body language they use, copy their behavior. If necessary, ask for a couple of lessons in assertive behavior.
47. Become an idea generator. Practice creating new ones original ideas. Let's have a second life unnecessary things. Invent new ways to use certain things. Think about what new things you can bring into your life. Just use your creativity.
48. Surround yourself with positive people. Negatively thinking people often unknowingly spoil the mood of those around them. Try to stay away from such people, or if you feel strong enough, charge them with positive energy and ideas. Try to be surrounded by positive, kind and cheerful people more often.
49. Smile more often. Find a reason to smile as often as possible. Watch a funny video or movie, read jokes or funny stories. Meet your friends and have fun with them.
50. Stop pleasing others. There is no need to adapt to other people - remain yourself. If you don't like something, don't do it just to please or please other people. Choose your own path in life.
51. Visualize yourself as a confident person. Imagine pictures of confident behavior as vividly and vividly as possible. different situations with your participation. Replay these images in your head day after day and try to act accordingly.
52. Make up affirmations. Repeating affirmations is one of the most effective ways to change your beliefs and inner attitude. Start telling yourself that you are a confident person, that every day you become more and more confident in yourself. Repeat positive affirmations of your confidence every day, whenever you have free time.
53. Find uplifting music. Good music can improve your mood and even increase your self-confidence. Find such music and listen to it from time to time. In difficult times, just remember the motive and words.
54. Understand that no one is better or worse than you. Just because someone has an ability or skill that you don't have doesn't make them better than you. Recognize that you are just different, but no worse or better than anyone else.
55. Be here and now. Learn to be here and now in any situation. Stop the flow of thoughts about the past and future, stop disturbing your inner state of calm with negative thoughts. Be as focused as possible on what is happening around you, focus on actions rather than thoughts.

Anyone can become more confident in themselves; all that is needed is to start taking real steps towards changing their way of thinking and behavior. By working on yourself and following the ways to increase confidence given in this article, you will learn to think, speak and act confidently in any situation. Don't be discouraged if you encounter difficulties at the beginning of your journey to self-confidence; this is natural for any endeavor. Just keep moving forward and you will succeed. Good luck to you!

A person manages to think up to 70 thousand thoughts every day. Moreover, in order not to go crazy, the brain selects those that you think consciously, and from them also those that you remember. Numerous studies indicate that over the past 20 years, thoughts of “self-doubt” have become more common in the human brain.

Basically, sociologists attribute this to the fact that we are more and more focused on success, we demand more from ourselves and, naturally, it becomes more and more difficult for us to justify these demands.

Because of this, we judge ourselves more and more and doubt ourselves more and more, which negatively affects our ability to achieve more and simply be happy. Breaking this cycle is not easy, but it is possible.

1. Recognize that you are not alone.
Before we start doubting ourselves, we compare ourselves to others. And it often seems to us that the people around us are smarter, more assertive, more talented than us and that we have no chance of outperforming these amazing people in any way. What's especially impressive to us is that they don't seem to doubt themselves at all. This is wrong. Everyone doubts themselves, even the most seemingly strong and confident people. And even the fact that you doubt yourself is often unknown to others. From the outside, you also probably seem to them to be an exceptionally self-confident person. So you are not alone. You are the same as everyone else. In any case, you are no worse.

2. Stop comparing yourself to friends and colleagues
Another good way Stop doubting yourself means constantly comparing your achievements with the achievements of your friends and colleagues. You must understand that the victories of others are not the measure of your success. Your experience is unique. A comparison, no matter in whose favor it is, will not be fair. All people are in different conditions and have different goals. Don't compare yourself to others, but...

3. Compare yourself to your past self.
Think back to yourself five years ago. Where have you been? What were you doing? What goals did you set for yourself?

Today you probably earn a lot more and you probably know a lot more than you did five years ago. All this means is that you are moving forward.

You see, you have already achieved a lot, which means you will be able to achieve even more in the future, so you should not be so hard on yourself. You're actually great.

4. Stop worrying about what others think of you.
Firstly, because you can only guess, but you cannot know for sure. Secondly, because it's a pretty stupid waste of time. And most importantly, it brings you absolutely no benefit. You have a choice: either live in such a way that others approve of you and try to adapt to their changeable and irrational tastes, or live for your own pleasure. Here, of course, self-doubt really hinders you - it seems to you that living the way you yourself would like to live is not good enough, not ambitious enough, not brave enough - well, or what other excuses you have come up with for yourself instead of admitting that it is better no one knows how to make yourself happier.

Trust your opinion - don't doubt it. If only because it is still the most competent in the matter of making oneself happy.

5. Don't be afraid to make decisions
You doubt yourself so much that it seems to you that no matter what decision you make, it will probably be the wrong one. This attitude towards your own abilities gradually leads to you trying not to make decisions at all, so as not to make a mistake. If you don’t make decisions, it means you’re not moving anywhere. You must understand that even the most bad decision(and why did you even think that it is the worst) - much better than no solution. So you have absolutely nothing to lose. Make a decision boldly, trust yourself, don’t doubt! In the end, a decision can always be changed - and this is also a decision.

At first you will have to force yourself, but then you will get the hang of it and even enjoy it, because for the first time in a long time it will begin to seem to you that your life is under control.

Why? Because that's how it is.

6. Set unattainable goals wisely
If your life goals don't scare you, they aren't big enough. On the other hand, if they are big enough, then the likelihood that you will judge yourself for not having achieved them yet also increases. Don't believe those who recommend setting simpler goals for yourself. No. There is no need to compromise, but you can make this path a little easier for yourself. Like any complex matter, this can be broken down into many simple ones.

Write out a plan for yourself to achieve your goal and be sure to reward yourself for overcoming each stage, no matter how small it may be.

This will give you self-confidence, and you will finally understand what a purposeful and self-confident person you are.

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In yourself is not your appearance, money or diplomas hanging on the wall. This is a worldview, a philosophy of life - something that can be instilled and nurtured. Of course, real, true confidence does not come immediately (because it requires both taming your ego and becoming more humble), but with the help of some techniques and tools you can see the first results within a few weeks. These are the techniques.

Start feeling confident now

Stop waiting for something to happen before you feel confident. Many people tell themselves the following:

I will feel confident when I lose 20 kilos.
I will feel confident when I am in a relationship with someone who loves and appreciates me.
I will feel confident when I receive my diploma.
I will feel confident when I have the right car and clothes.

Although you need to achieve goals for confidence to be real, it will not appear unless you start believing in yourself.

Stop waiting for some external signal to start feeling confident. Instead, start feeling confident right now, no matter where you are or what's happening around you.

Be resourceful

Most people put themselves into an unresponsive state before they take action. This state is created by thoughts and physiology.

Here are examples:

Before entering the boss’s office, a person tells himself that he is unworthy new position or a salary increase and finds thousands of justifications for this.
Before the start of an important presentation, he slouches, is afraid, and begins to get nervous.
Before talking to a person of the opposite sex whom he likes, he thinks that he has no chance, because he is stupid or ugly.

Paul McKenna, Ph.D., says that confident people do the opposite: before taking any action that involves uncertainty and risk, they are properly attuned to the challenge, approaching it with excitement, enthusiasm, determination, compassion, playfulness.

Pretend you are confident

They say that Salvador Dali was incredibly shy. For an artist who wanted to gain fame, this was akin to a sentence. But his uncle gave him the following advice: pretend to be an extrovert. Dali followed him and began to behave accordingly - not to be afraid to make contact with the most different people. He soon became what he pretended to be.

Act like "If only"

So how do you pretend? Act as if. Ask yourself the following questions:

If I had confidence in myself, how would I move?
If I were sure, how would I sit?
If I were confident, how would I dress?
If I were confident, how would I talk? What would I say now?
What thoughts would be running through my head?

And then just take your answers and start applying them. Do this consistently and very soon you will believe in yourself.

Take small, consistent steps

In the first point of this article, we stated that you need to feel confident right now, no matter where you are or how you feel. However, this is easier said than done. Here are the specific measures.

Imagine that there is another version of you standing or sitting across from you. This version is a little more confident than you.
Now ask yourself what you need to do to be able to become this confident version of yourself. Do you need to be more assertive? Do you need to break down your goals so you can start implementing them step by step? Is there a skill that needs to be developed? Start doing this.
Once you start taking steps in the right direction, imagine again that a more confident version of you is sitting opposite you, many times more confident. She is more charismatic and resourceful. What do you need to do to become one? Do it.
Continue to imagine versions of yourself that are happier, more enthusiastic, more passionate, and more determined. Keep taking action to become these better versions of yourself until you feel brimming with confidence.

Better take care of yourself

Confident people take care of themselves:

They eat.
They are leading.
They meditate, read.
Don't beat yourself up.

When you take care of yourself, you let yourself know that you consider yourself important and worthy of care and attention. And at the end of the day, your self-confidence depends on what you tell yourself about yourself.

Always be prepared

One of the best ways Be confident in any situation - do your homework ahead of time and be fully prepared for what awaits you. For example, if you have to prepare a presentation at work, do the following:

Make sure you take the time to do the necessary research.
Develop several alternatives.
Choose the alternative you think is best and get all the data you need.

After all, how can you feel confident in a situation for which you are not adequately prepared, even though you could be?

Visualize

This is perhaps one of the most powerful tools for self-confidence. When you need to do something important that is outside your comfort zone and you are worried that you will not succeed, visualize yourself in a situation in which you are doing a great job.

To illustrate, let's say you have to give a speech to your company's board of directors. Follow these steps:

Take a moment to close your eyes and see yourself standing in front of the board, confident and delivering your speech flawlessly.
See yourself in your imagination calmly answering tricky questions from board members.
Imagine how after the presentation everyone comes up to you, thanks you and shakes your hand.

Notice situations when you do everything well and correctly

Here are a few ideas you can try now:

Catch yourself doing something well, even if it's trivial. How, for example, did you masterfully brew tea today, spilling only half the teapot!
As you celebrate your success, give yourself a little pat on the back.
Allow yourself to feel proud of the work done.
Do this as often as possible.

We wish you good luck!